Thursday, September 11, 2008

The Writing Journey Continues


On Sunday I attended the Writer's Faire through UCLA Extension. It was so inspiring. Just being with other writer's, hearing their stories, buying a really cool t-shirt, was exhilarating. That very afternoon, when I got home, things began to fall apart. Stuff inside of me started coming to the surface. Self-doubt like a huge rock breaking off from the side of a mountain, toppled down onto my soul. It has taken me all week to regain my balance, but I think I'm finally able to get up, bruised and bleeding, but standing. The companion of self-doubt, I realized, is comparison. While the rocks of self-doubt immobilized me, comparison was the hard ground I fell on. So many suave, funny, intelligent writer's on panels with microphones, published. I, a writer undercover, posing as an audience, one of many hearts filled with hopes and dreams, looking from the outside to a place I want to be, wanting to articulate well what my heart has to say.


On any journey there needs to be preparation and planning. On the writing journey this equates to going to Writer's Faires, taking classes and sitting down to write everyday, believing in the destination I need to travel to however unknown or perilous. There is a way to get there.


One thing is needed: Courage. Writing is a battle. I will choose my companions carefully.

Sunday, August 17, 2008

I Like this Idea

Here's a chance to win Mary E. DeMuth's book "Authentic Parenting in Postmodern Culture". Just leave a post on my blog and you will be entered into the drawing. For more info go to http://tekemestudios.blogspot.com. Good luck and have fun!

Win a copy of Mary E. DeMuth's "Authentic Parenting in a Postmodern Culture: Practical Help for Shaping Your Children's Hearts, Minds, and Souls" from Tekeme Studios by leaving a comment on this post! Contest ends August 29, 2008.

Thursday, August 7, 2008

Perhaps This Is What Heaven Is Like

Be Inspired...

A son asked his father, 'Dad, will you take part in a marathon with me?' The father who, despite having a heart condition, says 'Yes'. They went on to complete the marathon together. Father and son went on to join other marathons, the father always saying 'Yes' to his son's request of going through the race together. One day, the son asked his father, 'Dad, let's join the Iron man together.'To which, his father said 'Yes.' For those who didn't know, Iron man is the toughest triathlon ever. The race encompasses three endurance events of a 2.4 mile (3.86 kilometer) ocean swim, followed by a 112 mile (180.2 kilometer) bike ride, and ending with a 26.2 mile (42.195 kilometer) marathon along the coast of the Big Island . Father and son went on to complete the race together. View the video by visiting the link below...



http://www.godtube.com/view_video.php?viewkey=8cf08faca5dd9ea45513

Tuesday, August 5, 2008

This Room I'm In


The fragrance of line-dried linens gathers in the room and swirls around with the steam of my hazelnut coffee up into the heavenly, high ceiling, white. And down again along the edge of my mind pulling me along the tail end of a dream lost many years ago. The curtains float on drifts of air breathing in and out. Deep purple shadows cast on a periwinkle blue wall have come to delight me, to call me on to an unknown destination of....artist?....writer? I don't know. But here I sit and wait and write and wait, pen poised, waiting for the hovering words and pictures to circulate.

Monday, July 28, 2008

A Cabin in the Woods


Solitude. Recently I've met someone who has a cabin in the woods and I haven't been able to get it out of my mind. The thought of getting away into the quiet where I can be alone sounds refreshing and relieving. Since I can't go to a cabin in the woods right now I try to practice solitude here at home. I sit down with my paper and pen, out in the warm air of the garden, hoping to empty my mind of it's busyness. I try to get to a place of tranquility and calm. I want to leave the static in me behind. I want to create open space where I can get some perspective. Where can I find restoration and rejuvenation? I listen. The curtain draws a breath in and then out. I do the same. Breathing in,"I forgot to."..............Breathing out,"I have to"..............the curtain knows something I don't. Being.

I realized today that even if I go to a cabin in the woods I won't find peace because I'll still be with my anxious self. There's no where to run. This week I will spend time catching my thoughts, the ones that rob me of hope and faith and love and peace. I will say to myself, "breathe." I will ask myself, "What is it that rejuvenates you?"
And now I ask you, dear reader, what is it that rejuvenates you? Where do you find solitude? What restores your soul?

Wednesday, July 16, 2008

Leo


Yesterday my friend found a little dog. She called me to tell me that he looked exactly like my dog, Henri. Henri is a Bichon-poodle. She said that he was under a car and she couldn't get him out.

I had just spent the morning lamenting over the fact that I need to have a schedule. But even when I have a schedule, I thought, there are so many distractions that make it difficult to keep on track. I had just sent my husband off to the store with his mother, who is visiting, in hopes of writing a schedule while they were gone.

"Oh", I said. "Poor little guy". I remembered when Henri climbed a brick wall when he was a puppy, ran off into a busy intersection and was rescued by a lady who called me because he had his tags. "Does he have a tag?"

"I don't think so", she said. "He growls at me when I put my hand toward him. I'm afraid he'll bite me if I try to get him out".

"Try giving him some meat or cookies", I said.

A few minutes later she called me back to say that he wasn't interested in food. He just stayed in one place looking at her.

"Do you want me to come over and help you?" You don't have time to do this, I thought. But neither did I have any clear idea of what actually needed to be done because I hadn't written my schedule yet. It wouldn't take that long. I would come right back. The dog's little face was now in my heart. I saw him shaking underneath the car, white fluffy hair leaning hard against a hot rubber tire. I had to go.

My friend was waiting on her front porch, her chin resting on her hand. We were so happy to see each other and gave a long hug. She only lives two miles away. I have known her for 32 years and was her maid of honor. We are so comfortable with each other and enjoy each other's company. When we haven't seen each other for a long time we just pick up where we left off. But our busyness, our schedules, my preconceived idea that I must have a schedule and stick to it, can keep us from life's valuable interruptions, like friends dropping by. Now there was a need.

I got down on my hands and knees, talking gently, trying to coax the dog out. I brought some lamb meat with me, but he just stared at me. He was trembling and looked so sad. He barely fit under the car, so oily dirt turned his fur black on top of his head. My friend decided to get a broom and push him toward me. He got really mad and bit at the straw, made himself heavy in the grass but she just kept pushing. As soon as his head was out I began petting him. He just laid there on his side. I pulled him out a little further, kept talking softly and could tell by the way he was laying that he had a sweet disposition, much like Henri.

. I picked him up and held him close, he put his head under my chin and stayed perfectly still. We brought him into the house to calm him down and earn his trust. Soon my friend's husband had him checking out his new environment, maybe his new home. My friend had always said that only if she could have a dog like Henri would she have a dog. I thought maybe he was a gift to her. My friends wanted to take his picture and put it around the neighborhood. They looked in the Lost and Found for possible adds. They also considered what his name should be.

My friend's husband had just opened the screen door when we heard children yelling from a car window. At that moment the dog's ears perked up and he ran out the door. My friend's husband tried to stop the car but it went by too fast. So he jumped in his car and went after them. The dog stood in the middle of the street, ears hopeful. He didn't run from me when I went to pick him up. "He's so happy now", my friend said.

A mom and two kids pulled up. "Leo!", they said. I handed the dog to the little girl. The mom thanked us so much. They were neighbors who had not met before. And this was the path they took to walk the dog, so Leo was probably just taking himself for a walk.

Old friends got together, a little dog was rescued, a family was spared a loss and new friends were made all because I left my time to make my much needed schedule. I knew I was exactly where I was supposed to be.